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Jokes for Spring

Man said to God: Why did you make women so beautiful?

God said to man: So that you will love them.

Man said to God: But why did you make them so dumb?

God said to man: So that they will love you.

Cool

There is a California dude going through a desert. He’s wearing shorts, sunglasses, a towel and listening to music on his walkman. He’s having a good time. Suddenly he sees a caravan approaching. He stops the Arabs and asks them cheerfully: “Hey dudes, how far is the sea?” They look at each other and say: “Two thousand miles!” And he says: “Wow, what a cool beach!”

Cool

Money talks. The trouble is, it only knows one word; goodbye.

Cool

”Dad, can I have another glass of water please?” “But I’ve given you ten already!”   “Yes, but the bedroom’s still on fire!”

Cool

A little boy asks driver: ,, Could you give me a ride please? I’m late for school.”        

“But I’m heading in the opposite direction, son.”

“Even better!”

Cool

A couple is celebrating their 60th birthdays. A fairy godmother appears and says she’ll give them one wish each. The wife wants to travel around the world. The fairy waves her wand, and boom! The woman has a wad of tickets in her hand. Next, it is the husband’s says shyly: “Well, I’d like to have a woman 30 years younger than me.” The fairy picks up her wand, and boom! He’s 90!

Piotr Palicki






 
Jokes

Teacher: Maria please point to America on the map. 
Maria: This is it. 
Teacher: Well done. Now class, who found America? 
Class: Maria did.

***

When I was young I didn't like going to weddings.
My grandmother would tell me, "You're next"
However, she stopped doing that after I started saying the same thing to her at funerals. 

***

A: What do you call a deer with no eyes? 
B: No idea. (No Eye Deer.)

A: What do you call a dead deer with no eyes? 
B: Still no idea.

***

Q: What letter of the alphabet is an insect? 

A: B. (bee)

 

Q: What letter is a part of the head? 
A: I. (eye)

 

Q: What letter is a drink? 
A: T. (tea)

 

Q: What letter is a body of water? 
A: C. (sea)

 

Natalia P., Basia T.

 
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